This Week in The Feel Better Letter 👇
✅ High achievers often bring the same “work harder” mindset into recovery — and it can actually keep the loop going.
âś… Healing doesn't happen through force, fixing, or constantly trying to improve yourself.
âś… Recovery requires trust, courage, and learning to loosen your grip.
âś… New episode: Do Intrusive Thoughts Last Forever? Here's What Actually Makes Them Stick
Matt's Message of the Week
You Can't "Achieve" Recovery
One of the biggest traps high achievers fall into is bringing their achievement mindset into recovery.
You work harder.
Consume more information.
Analyze yourself more.
Try to figure out what's wrong.
Wake up and scan to see if the thoughts or feelings are still there.
And before you know it, recovery itself becomes another thing you're trying to accomplish.
But here's the problem:
You can't "achieve" recovery.
Healing doesn't happen through force.
You can't work your way out of fear by obsessively trying to fix yourself.
In fact, that very mindset can often become part of the thing that's keeping you stuck.
Because healing is a natural process.
Think about it: When you cut your hand, you don't force it to heal.
The more you interfere with it, the more likely you are to slow the process down.
Recovery works in a similar way.
Yes, change is required.
Yes, you need to learn new ways of responding, build new patterns, and shift the way you're relating to fear.
But it doesn't come from forcing yourself into recovery.
It comes from courage.
From trust.
From learning to loosen your grip on the very things you've been desperately trying to control.
So if you've been working incredibly hard on your recovery and still feel like you're carrying a mountain around with you...
Maybe the answer isn't to work harder.
Maybe it's time to look at the mindset you're bringing into the process.
Because sometimes, the thing you're doing to heal...
is the very thing preventing you from healing.
(Click below to listen to the full message.)
4 Limited 1-on-1 Coaching Spots Opening
I'm opening up 4 limited 1-on-1 coaching spots beginning September 1.
This is for those of you who understand this work intellectually but are still struggling to fully integrate it into your life.
Sometimes, it's not about needing more information or working harder.
There can be limiting beliefs, unconscious blocks, and other patterns underneath the surface that are preventing you from truly embodying what you already know.
Through 1-on-1 coaching, we'll work closely together not just during our sessions, but throughout the week with ongoing messaging, voice notes, and support to help you refine and integrate the work into your day-to-day life.
If working together feels aligned:
👉 [Click Here to Apply for Coaching]
Helpful Episodes for the Week
Do Intrusive Thoughts Last Forever? Here's What Actually Makes Them Stick
In this episode, Matt explains the real difference between a thought that's neutral and a thought that feels intrusive — and it has nothing to do with the content of the thought itself. Once you understand what's actually driving the intrusive experience, you stop fighting a battle you were never going to win.
👉 [Watch Episode]
How to Live Beyond Fear and Reclaim Your Life
In this episode, Matt gets brutally honest about fear, what it actually is, and why calling it a disease or disorder keeps people stuck inside it. Drawing from his own years lost in fear, Matt breaks down why the theme (harm, contamination, relationship, whatever the mind fixates on) is never the real problem, and why fear is a state of consciousness, not a diagnosis.
👉 [Watch Episode]
Why Chasing Approval and Control Is Destroying You
In this episode, Matt explores what happens when your nervous system is hijacked by approval and you slowly slip into chronic self abandonment, quietly eroding your sense of safety, shrinking your world, and creating the loss of authentic relationships—even while you look like “the good person” on the outside.
👉 [Watch Episode]
Interested in Working Together?
🧠Free Assessment: Get Your Custom Guide
Take a quick assessment to identify where you are in your recovery journey and get a personalized guide with next steps.
👉 [Take the Free Assessment]
đź“– The Book: From Stuck to Unstuck
Learn the Triple-A Response™ and discover a clear, proven path for stepping out of the fear loop and reclaiming your life.
👉 [Get the Book]
🌱 Taking Back Control Program
Join our 12-week recovery program and get the structure, support, and guidance you need to create lasting change.
👉 [Apply to Join]
🗣️ Work 1-on-1 with Matt
Get personalized coaching and direct support from Matt to solidify your recovery and deepen your practice of trust.
👉 [Work with Matt]
This Week’s Reminder
You don't need to work harder to heal.
You don't need to force recovery to happen.
Sometimes, healing begins...
when you finally loosen your grip.
To your freedom and success,
Matt
